Tuesday, April 17, 2012

What I Miss

I miss sitting under the table instead of at the table, for no reason other than I damn well want to.

I miss reciting random poetry, or passages from my favorite books, and having at least one person gasp and say, "Oh my gosh, that's A Clockwork Orange/A Wrinkle in Time/Anne of Green Gables/Emily Dickinson/J.R.R. Tolkien/Jack Kerouac, right?" instead of giving me a blank look.

I miss knowing even before walking into class that I am going to get a hug from at least one person.

I miss being able to call my best friend and say, "I'm having an awful day," and hear, "I'll be over in a minute, love" instead of "I wish I could be there."

I miss cuddling with gay boys.

I miss running around barefoot in a thunderstorm without worrying about stepping on a cigarette butt.

I miss people understanding why a certain song, book, movie, or poem makes me cry.

I miss quoting Cyrano de Bergerac with the secure knowledge that half the people in the room will know exactly what I'm referencing.

I miss being compared to obscure--or not-so-obscure--literary or film characters (Zelig, Scarlett O'Hara, Violet Baudelaire, Molly Aster, Hermione Granger, Edward Scissorhands, Katrina Van Tassel, Beetlejuice--thank you, Person Who Called Me That, you know who you are--and my personal favorite, Sal Paradise). Instead, I've been labeled, even by non-Glee watchers, "the cinema-centric version of Rachel Berry." Thanks a lot, guys. Thanks. A. Lot.

I miss walking into Post-Production class and knowing that the teacher understood me thoroughly--and I miss being called "dedicated" rather than "weird."

I miss staying up until four AM writing scripts. Where did all my ideas go?

I miss playing Neopets with my roommate.

I miss being a Hottest Suitemate.

I miss saying "Hey, let's do something crazy" and hearing the reply, "Sure, what'd you have in mind?" instead of, "Why should we?"

I miss Saxophone Boy.

I miss Organ Girl.

I miss Goddamn Gypsy.

I miss my Dead Poets.

I miss Interlochen.

(I know I said I wasn't going to do this...excuse me while I feel a little--okay, a lot--homesick.)

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